She’s been gone.

Oddly enough a few years ago I lost my best friend, actual death, not by choice. She was taken by cancer, and it was a shit show. Cancer fucking sucks. 

I wonder how the comparrison is between my previous  years with her, and who I am now. I think of all the things we’ve been through and how much I miss her. Today is a sad day, no one to share it with, no one that understands me, no one to give me a hug. It seems every time this date comes up, the one I’m closest too, wants nothing to do with me. 

I often wonder if I’ll have some one I wake up next to me, hug me, and say I know what today is, go ahead and miss your friend, here’s a hug and a kiss. Someone I can just talk to, maybe to feel better about things.

But I’m here dealing with it on my own, per usual. I’m used to it, and there is nothing wrong with it, but once and a while, I’d like someone to think of me.

I miss my friend, as she was pretty damn awesome. I’m not going to go into a huge gushfest, as I have done that so many times. Today, I’m just going to listen to her favorite band, and some 80’s music. 

Miss you girl. 

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