We have nothing to believe in anymore, you have put me in a box, and as nice as the box is, I’m about to tear this motherfucker down. I have been in this relationship before, currently, and I am ready to blow up. I refuse to do this again with anyone, no matter what. The pain I have from having to change from person to person is getting old. Maybe the pain that is mine to bear is that of loneliness. This pain of trying to win the hearts of others is becoming unbearable, and the fact there is little to no pay off in the end, it’s hard to swallow so much for so little. I have proven myself over and over, and for what? Love lost… The overwhelming darkness that has become my life is overtaking. I try to fight it, get little flashes of light here and there to keep the pain from engulfing me totally, but it is not enough.
I have waited patiently, I have been on the cusp of letting go so many times, but I get flashes of what could be, and it seems like enough at the time. I am at a lost. Suffering through these things doesn’t always bring reward at the end, in fact it can end up being worse than it was to begin with. Do we suffer because it’s worth it or because we have hope?! Do we suffer because we are afraid of letting go, or falling in?!?
Suffer!! And don’t you bitch about the pain.
Suffer!! You can heal the wounds in vane.
Suffer!! It’s really all the same.
Suffer!! I have never seen this black rain.