1000 year fight.

Take this darkness from me, I can’t feel anymore. I have battled this shit a long time ago, and I don’t want to do this fight again. I almost lost, was close to defeat, but I rose to my feet and got it right. This fight is different and it has brought a new kryptonite, a new weakness I have never had to deal with. 

I am pushing hard to get through this, I am getting weaker faster, and longer… The attacks seem to be harder than ever before. The pain they inflict have carried weight, and it’s a never ending sting. I swing at the attacks as if I have enough strength to block them. A feeble attempt met with a rush attack for even trying to stop them. 

My back is on the cold concrete floor, wet from the pouring rain from the cold black cloud. My breath is shallow, the tears are real, and the pain holds me down like a heavy weight pressing down on my chest. In reality it’s my heart trying to escape, trying to explode, trying to get away from the pain. 

I close my eyes to stop the flowing tears of sorrow. I feel the rain drops bounce of my skin, the rain feels good on my face to cool the heat of giving up. I can start to let go, maybe just a little bit to ease this pain, maybe just roll over so I can see where I am.

I’m so lost since I’ve been here, laying around waiting for someone to come along and help me out of this pain box. I’m not sure how I really got here, I know I went for a walk, and that I fell, fell hard, and now I’m wondering where I went wrong, how I got here, and if there is a way out, a way back before I took that wrong turn.

I hear voices once and a while, but they seem to never get close to me, or see me. But every once and a while I think they do see me, by what they are saying. Voices say things like; Look at him, he looks dead. Why is he on his back like that? That looks like a man with a broken heart. He looks pathetic. Is that someones trash? Looks like a man who gave up on life. She couldn’t be with him, so now he’s dead inside… Then I think, maybe those voices I hear, are the ones in my own head. 

I open my eyes to see that cold black cloud still above me with a sinister flash of lightning, and a rush of more rain. I smile in the face of evil, and begin to prepare myself for another round, I feel the rest I’ve had was enough. What’s the worst that can happen?! More pain? Losing? Sadness? I will beat this, just may take longer than it should… longer than it should. 


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